...lessons from a laundry rack

I love my silly laundry rack.  I've had it since I was a single girl in Virginia.  It's lightweight, folds down to almost nothing and we pop it in the van on road trips for those swimsuits that make it impossible to take a shower when they are hung from every knob and spot.  It does everything a laundry rack should do... except fold and put away the laundry.  Sigh.


I've been staring at it for maybe two weeks.  I've lost count.  Like a piece of modern art.  I even see potential for a dress design with a fun geometric print.

The shadow play is cool.  I've left it there just to study.... not.

There's a problem with this rack.  Me.  It's becoming warped because I've left it like this.  It's not being used for it's intended purpose and I'm not willing to do a single thing about it except think about it.

It sits there accusing me... day after day.

In it's current state it is highly disfunctional...  kind of like something else I've been avoiding.  Intimate time with God.

The longer I leave it like this, the worse it seems.  There's nothing wrong with the rack.  It's not broken.  There's just one crucial little spot that needs to be fixed.

It's not even complicated.  There are even several options.  It's easy. 

So why am I avoiding it!

Because when it's fixed, there's a job waiting. 

Because I'm overwhelmed at my inability to maintain the long haul stuff.  The budget that is taxed beyond it's limits - literally.  The meals, the meals, the meals.  The house that got neglected so that all the little jobs are now big jobs.  Things that depress me because they scream, "You can't even do this stupid little job?  You are a failure." 

There are a million huge things too.  Questions I can't answer.  How will we pay for Davis' college?  Should I get a job or obey the Lord and paint?  Laina needs several medical appointments.  How will we handle that?  There's a script deadline.  The posters aren't designed.  The music's not done.  I've failed at being a full-in mentor mom at MOPS.  I've got gifts to paint, more meals to make.  Why can't I make a menu and shop frugally for it.  I want to be a Proverbs 31 wife and I can't even get the laundry done!

STOP! 

The truth is, if I just kept at it, it's probably all doable.  It's the deciding part.  I'm stymied. 

The lie I keep listening to is fear's voice saying, "You're failing and you don't have time to spend with God.  He'll just give you something more for your list.  Some character assignment that you can also fail at."  Lies. Lies.

If I keep believing lies and try to perform my way through... oh and I'm hosting a party, the easter decorations are in bins in the middle of the floor, I need to research scholarships,  the car sounds like it has croup... and we still have six miles of trim to paint... and.... and...

...and I want to eat sugar, preferably chocolate, then jump in the bed and pull the covers up over my head.

If I try to function on my own, I can... to a point.

But not well.   And not for long.



Click.

One little act of life will make a weak piece of plastic a genius design.  

CLICK.  One step.  One thing is needful.

Mary chose that.  She stopped in the middle of the frenzy to hear what Jesus would say.

And He didn't scold her for all the failures and the "undones".  In fact, he praised her.

CLICK.

So dear reader, I'm taking my frail frame to the couch for some listening time.  I may be fragile, but when I'm clicked in place, I know I can do what I was intended to do.  Sure, maybe I'm not a boat yard crane.  Maybe I'm not a mountain moving bulldozer.  But that's OK.  I'm a memory maker.  

A "fragile things holder"

And on a given day... if I'm clicked in place... I can hold a whole load of laundry.

©2014Lydia D. Crouch